HELP! I've Fallen In Love...Again.
- Christine Gray
- 3 days ago
- 3 min read
Warning: You May Be in Love with a Fictional Man (Again)
Ladies, let’s talk. If you've ever found yourself clutching a romance novel to your chest, sighing dramatically, and whispering, “Where do I find a man like this in real life?”—welcome. You're among friends.
For the intelligent, well-read, and wildly romantic woman (yes, I'm talking about you!), there's a special kind of magic in cracking open a good romance book. Especially when the male lead walks off the page, winks at you, and steals your heart faster than you can say "chapter two."
You Might Be In Love With a Fictional Man If...
You got unholy thoughts after seeing that fine ass priest. The one that was in Vatican square being interviewed after the picking of the new Pope. Nice teeth, facial hair, buff, sexy smile, tan...hell, I considered all the sins I could commit.
You keep reading lines out loud, biting your lip, and giggling like a teenager. “I should have realigned your attitude and cervix from the start......" giggles in grown woman.
**You begin every sentence with, "Well, in this book I’m reading..." Your friends now roll their eyes before you even finish your sentence.
**You sigh dramatically when a real-life man says "Hey." Because the fictional one would've said, "Hello, love," while shirtless, changing your tire on the interstate so you can get to work, and confessing how he’s emotionally unavailable but ready to change.
You’ve Googled ‘how to meet morally grey billionaires with soft centers.’ Still no clear answers. Still hopeful.
Symptoms of Book Boyfriend Addiction
An ever-growing TBR (To Be Romanced) pile.
Inability to sleep until you find out if the ruthless mafia boss finally offs the guy that dared to touch his woman.
Tear-stained cheeks from fictional breakups that feel way too real.
Your Kindle battery dies more often than your phone.
The realization that you now prefer imaginary men to dating apps.
But Don’t Panic: There Are Cures (Kind of)
Look, no one’s trying to cure you completely. But there are ways to manage your passionate affairs with fictional men.
Rotate Your Genres: Take a little break and read a thriller, memoir, nonfiction or binge a series on Netflix. You might miss the brooding duke, but at least you’ll learn how to bake sourdough or solve a mystery.
Book Club It Out: Get with your girls and laugh about the spicy scenes over wine. Nothing brings balance like sisterhood, Chardonnay, and mutual swooning.
Write Your Own Romance: Can’t find the perfect man? Create him! Writing your own romance can be empowering. It helps you understand what you want and channels your energy into manifesting the love you desire.
Schedule Reality Checks: Go on real dates! Single, go out with friends. Or, if you’re taken, plan something cute with your partner. Bring a little fiction-level romance into your own life.
In Conclusion (aka, Chapter 37: My Heart Belongs to Fictional Men)
Falling in love with fictional men is a sacred rite of passage for many of us. It doesn’t mean you're delusional. It means you have taste. High standards. A rich imagination. And honestly? A very full heart.
So, the next time you swoon over a caring single dad who secretly owns an art gallery and is a Vampire king? Embrace it. Love hard, turn the page, and fall in love all over again.
Just don’t be surprised when the next man you meet in real life feels a little… underwritten.
Stay romantic, stay ridiculous, and keep reading.
Your book boyfriend(s) await.
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